There’s this one thing that’s said so consistently by so many people. And when you hear what it is, you might think ‘So what Kurek? I don’t really mean it.’ But I’m here to tell you that by giving this sentence power, it’s costing you your life.
What I mean by that is it’s costing you your life’s goals and dreams. You see, the time of your life is ticking away, and time is your most valuable asset and investment. Whatever time you put in you don’t get back. So every time we use this sentence that I’m about to share with you, it’s definitely costing you time and fulfillment and enjoyment of your life.
When you hear this one thing that’s so commonly said, you might say ‘Hey Kurek, you don’t understand my life. I don’t have an easy life like you! I have these goals and dreams but I just can’t seem to achieve them or get them done. I can’t afford it like you can!”
Well, let’s start with that belief system about who I am, or anybody else that’s successful. Everybody goes through the same stuff in life. We all have fear. We all have doubt. We all have insecurities. If you think having money in your life means that you don’t have financial worries, well that’s not accurate. Only poor people hold the belief that that having money in your life means that you’re free of financial worries.
You see, there was a time in my life when I was homeless, and living in my car in Los Angeles. Now, you might think that’s an exciting, glamorous story but let me tell you when you’re homeless and living in your car on the streets of LA, there’s nothing glamorous about it. I was living out of my car because my finances and my management of my finances, and my creation of making money was so bad that I couldn’t afford to live in an apartment. Luckily, I had a car to live in.
The thing is, I didn’t really have any money worries back then. Why? Well, I had no money to worry about! Then when I started making money at a level I’d only dreamed about, like making a million dollars, I found out from my accountant that I spent 1.2 million dollars that year. Now I had financial worries! Like I said, having money in your life doesn’t mean that you’re free of financial worries.
So the first thing we need to do is strip away this story that ‘other people have it so easy’ and that ‘their lives are so different’. They may be different in the results they’ve produced but the truth is we all go through the same stuff. We all have fear, doubt, and insecurities. Time is passing for all of us. The only difference is that the successful people in life – that is, the people that are holistically successful being happy and healthy, in great relationships, financial freedom, etc. and the masses is that the successful people have learnt how to manage how they think and feel, and that’s why they produce different results.
So here’s the one thing that’s so consistently said, that’s costing so many people their life’s goals and dreams…
I can’t do it.
I can’t afford it.
You see, when you say ‘I can’t’ what’s happening is that you’re the captain of your own ship, and when you tell your brain that you can’t, well since you’re the boss your brain won’t look for any answers. Why? You just told it that there aren’t any answers. So your brain isn’t even going to look for any strategies to get you out of the problem.
So if you say, ‘I can’t come up with any solutions’, you’re right. Why? Because you just said so.
If you say, ‘I can’t afford it’ you’re right. Why? Because you just said so.
Now I can already hear you saying ‘…but Kurek you don’t know my situation. I really can’t afford it!’ Well with that enthusiasm, emphasis and inflection in the way you just said that you can’t afford it, you’re actually making that thought even stronger! Which means you’re getting farther and farther away from being able to afford it.
I’m going to show you today how you can afford it.
The first thing we have to change is ‘I can’t’. And this is probably not what you were expecting to hear from me, but it’s not about changing it to ‘I can’ because positive thinking doesn’t work. For example, if you’re having a rough day and you say to yourself ‘I’m happy! I’m happy’, all your brain’s going to say is BS – you’re not happy! Of course BS stands for Belief Systems…
So trying to out-think yourself when by saying ‘I can’ when you’re really thinking ‘I can’t’ is not going to help you because your brain is going to say ‘BS, no you can’t!’ and all it does is become self-defeating.
Instead, what you want to do is change the ‘I can’t’ to ‘How can I?’ or ‘How can I do it?’ It’s biblical – Ask and thou shalt receive. You see, any question that you ask of your brain, your brain has to answer.
I‘ll give you an example of this. Years ago I was doing a preview seminar in NZ, in which I was promoting a 2-day workshop at $1000 a seat that I was holding at a later date. Two women spoke up and said, “Mr. Ashley, we’d love to come to your program but we’re from the south of NZ and your seminar’s on the north side of NZ. So not only do we have to pay the seminar tickets, but the flights, accommodation, and everything else, and we can’t afford that, our business is struggling right now.”
So here’s what I told the two women to do:
“Go and fill out the paperwork to reserve your spot for my seminar. If you don’t show up, don’t worry; I’m not going to chase you down. I just want you to make a decision and commit to it right now.
Then, for the next thirty days, every day I want you to write down the answer to this question: What are three new ways that I can produce more income? That’s all you have to do. Don’t judge your answers, don’t think you’re answers are stupid or impossible to achieve. Just write them down, whatever you come up with. Because what you’re doing is asking your brain for strategies. So don’t beat your brain up for giving you an answer because then it’s not going to give you any other answers. Makes sense, right?
And at the end of the thirty days, you’re going to have 90 new strategies to create more wealth in your life. Do you think out of those 90 strategies that one of those might work? Perhaps a combination of a couple of them might work!”
You see, in order to change your life and to start achieving your life goals and dreams, you need to:
- Make a decision. It’s not a ‘should’, it’s a ‘must’. I must do this. I’m doing this. I have to do that. You’ve got to turn that decision making muscle on.
- Commit to the decision. Every day you’ve got to stay with that decision.
- Invest in yourself. And it’s right there in the word. I invest in me.
The best investment you can ever make is in your own personal development. As you grow as a person, the person you become is going to create the results that you’ve never created before by doing things you’ve never ever know how to do let alone would do.
So the ladies from the preview seminar went away and for the next thirty days wrote down, each day, three new ways that they could produce income. And there I am a couple of months later running my 2-day workshop on in the north of NZ, and I’m asking the audience if there’s anything they want to share, and guess who stands up? The two women. They said, “Mr. Ashley, you would not believe what happened! We quadrupled the profits of our business by putting into action the strategy that you gave us! A lot of the answers we came up with pertained to our business, and we put them into action and then we produced the results! So not only are we here at your workshop, we had the money for the flights, hotels, food and our business is buzzing!”
So in the case of these two women, all those answers, those strategies that they came up with were always there. Yet, why is it that they couldn’t see them before? Why hadn’t they discovered those strategies to put into action before?
Well, because when you say ‘I can’t’ your brain stops looking for answers. You just can’t see it. It’s like a blind spot.
The opportunity of a lifetime, the idea of a lifetime, the strategy that you need comes around about every two seconds in life. To be able to see them, we have to develop ourselves so that we can see it. How? By asking for it.
Ask yourself ‘how can I?’ Ask and thou shalt receive. It’s powerful and it’s transformational. So quit saying ‘I can’t do it’ and instead ask ‘how can I?’